It’s no more a secret that Facebook status updates are one of the best ways to keep in touch with your friends and get people excited about what you have to say. We’re all social being and life is about communication and expression, so updating sarcastic Facebook status messages is one of the most interesting pastime of Facebook lovers.
What Can I Post on Facebook to Get a Lot of Likes?
It’s only natural for us, as humans, to crave for a little spice here and there in our lives, It’s more like wanting to do something out of the ordinary so as to get extraordinary results. Of course, there are so many ways you could possibly do that, but we’ll be sticking to getting more likes on your Facebook profile. Oh! The excitement that comes with getting more likes on your Facebook profile is priceless. Thus, we resort to sarcasm to bring about that spice we so need in our lives, Sarcasm is really fun and it takes a funny person to see the fun in it.
Have you ever pondered on sarcastic statuses you could upload on Facebook to get other people to join you in the world of sarcasm and also increase the likes you get? I guess you’ve done that, but I’d bet you haven’t seen any of these sarcastic Facebook statuses we’ve been able to compile.
The Sarcastic Facebook Status messages given in this collection can be the perfect recipe to express your mood perfectly! So, scroll down and pick the one that will serve your need.
Sarcastic Facebook Status
The list below is gonna help out in case you run out of ideas of sarcastic Facebook statuses that will get likes when you upload on your profile.
1. Dear Facebook: Please stop asking me what’s on my mind. I’m going to get myself in trouble if I keep expressing what’s on my mind to you.
2. Now that everyone is on Facebook, isn’t it funny how many people from your school days, that barely spoke to you, now want to add you as their friend!
3. Black Friday – Items are always 50% off. Does it imply that black people loves cheap things? Why can’t it be White Friday?
4. If there’s a holiday called Teacher’s day, is it not unfair that there is nothing like Student’s day, are we not human being too?
5. I’ve stopped believing in statuses like “Spending time with my sweet pie” or “Enjoying a night out with my boo” because if what you’re doing is so awesome and sweet why are you on Facebook?
6. Since women are to be treated equally, it’s high time the grooms parents begin to collect dowry too!
7. Since feminism is the talk of the day, I won’t be shock finding out if women are looking for ways to share their 9month pregnancy with their husband
8. Why is it that when you ask a man to do something and he doesn’t, he’s resting, but when you ask a woman to do something and she doesn’t, she’s lazy?
9. Isn’t it funny when people are watching a movie with you, and then they scream “DID YOU SEE THAT?!” No, I just spent twelve thousand naira at the cinema to stare at the floor!
10. Since the scripture says we should love everybody, then some I love to be around, some I love to avoid, and others I would love to punch in the face with a smile. At least I’m fulfilling scripture?
11. An EX is called an EX because that’s an EXample of an EXtreme waste of time! I’m I not saying the truth?
12. Have you ever wanted to just slap the first person you talk to just to see what their reaction would be?
13. I never seems to wonder why we go to school if education is knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption leads to crime, and crime doesn’t pay and it’s also evil?
14. THEY say money doesn’t bring you happiness and I say neither does being broke.
15. People say they want people to stay out of their business. Well here’s clue for you “DON’T POST IT ON FACEBOOK IDIOT!” Other wise shut up when somebody does!
16. Can you still get into Heaven if you have already given your soul to someone?
17. When life hands you lemons, shoot them in the chest then squeeze the lemons in the wound and yell “HOW IS THE LEMONS NOW?”
18. I once heard someone says all people have the right to stupidity but far far too many people have indeed abuse that privilege.
19. I’m getting tired of Facebook always asking me “What’s On Your Mind?” So, my fellow friends, what do you think is on my mind? Because I’m tired of answering myself.
20. I strongly believe that if men can’t aim properly when they pee, they should be put back in pull ups and go through potty training again and be made to sit like a girl.
21. Facebook is starting to be like my fridge, I know nothing is there but I keep checking it anyway!
22. If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you and I won’t charge you much. What are friends for!
23. I am sitting here looking at the most amazing person I have ever seen, smart, funny, caring, and absolutely stunning! Yes, I am looking in the mirror!
24. Stop acting like you think you’re better than someone else because you have more money, better clothes, a sugar daddy to pay for it all
25. Don’t make fun of another lady because she couldn’t afford what you slept with everyone in the hood to buy.
26. I think it will be good if many people should really start their status’s off as Dear Diary.
27. I really want to know why they call it “Common sense”? It’s so not common! They should just call it sense: a rare condition that few possess!
28. When someone sees you crying, and ask: “Are you sad?” Punch them in the face, and ask: “Are you okay?”
29. Wonders shall never end, you met me inside and yet you still think it’s sensible on your part to exclaimed, you’re home. No, I’m at the cinema watching Wakanda!
Also Read: Inspirational Statuses for Facebook
Funny Sarcastic Facebook Status
1. Yes, you have the right to your opinion, but I also have the right to think you’re stupid!
2. You’re dating my ex? Cool, would you also like to use my old toothbrush before I throw it away?
3. Letter to my future children, when I die don’t write “R.I.P” on my grave, write “B.R.B.”
4. Never look to the past, cause you can’t change it. Never look to the future cause it’s just too far away. But look on the ground, maybe you’ll find a penny.
5. Wonders shall never cease. Why did people have to buy or cheat their way through a game that is played just for fun.
6. My sarcasm only gets me in trouble when my brain to mouth filter is malfunctioning!
7. Please don’t judge, but sincerely I don’t condone neither do I support abortion, but I know a few people that would have been better off being aborted.
8. You’re so vain, you probably think this status is about you.
9. It’s funny how people assume you’re talking about them when your status says something bad. If you are a better friend, why did you have to assume I’m talking about you.
10. Your parent just called and they asked if you would bring home some condoms, so that they won’t make the same mistake, twice.
11. If you think because I drink more alcohol than you, that makes me an alcoholic. No, you’re wrong I’m not an alcoholic man I am a social drinker. The problem is, I socialise too much!
12. I wish I was as smart as I think I am.
13. Thought for the day. Why do people say I saw it with my own eyes. Do they ever have someone else eyes?
14. I love how they call it “Common sense.” It sure doesn’t seem very common these days!
15. If you think I’m ignoring you, no I’m not ignoring you. I suffer from selective hearing, usually triggered by idiots!
16. Remember all the times you told me that I would never meet anyone like you? You were right! I’ll never make the same mistake twice! I’m not a fool.
17. Come to think of it a condom could have saved us all from this ongoing recession!
18. I don’t know about you, but sometimes after a terrible day, I do think whoever put “Good and Morning” together deserves a good slap in the face!
19. This thought never seems to annoy me, “People who bite the hand that feeds them usually lick the boot that kicks them.”
20. Common now! Facebook called it “STATUS” not “DIARY”! Do we really need a play by play of your day.
21. I was God once. It was going really well until everyone died. Though it was a dream. Chai! Thanks goodness, God is not man.
22. It’s easier to find virgin mothers than finding true love these days.
23. I’ve got no problem with you hating me, I’m just not interested in making anyone see reasons to hate me less or love me more.
24. The best kind of revenge is to show them that they were never needed in your life.
25. No one’s ugly, they’re just broke, money brings out the hidden beauty in everyone.
Deep Facebook Statuses That Will Get a Lot of Likes
If you are looking for deep Facebook statuses that will get you a lot of likes, your search ends right here because we’ve got you covered, Yeah, you read right. The following statuses are going to help you get a lot of likes through deep quotes.
1. Being different can either be a curse or a blessing, it all depends on what you make of it.
2. Live life and enjoy life to the fullest because you only live once.
3. Don’t let people ever pull you down, you have to show them you don’t belong below.
4. More often than not, we accord a lot of respect to those who are undeserving of it.
5. Your general view about life counts a lot, you might choose to see your glass half full or half empty, either way, your view is right.
6. It hurts so bad when you end up being blamed for doing what you think is right and best for everyone.
7. Even if it’s hard, be kind, a little kindness here goes a long way there.
8. Friends are blood brothers and sisters from another mother.
9. The best kind of friends you’ll ever meet are those who are true to your face and behind your back.
10. Choose to be optimistic even in stormy days, there will be a rainbow after the rain.
Facebook Statuses That Will Get a Lot of Likes
Apart from being a very good platform to make and meet new friends, Facebook is also an outlet for our opinions and everything we have on our minds. On Facebook, we get to talk about things we want other people to know about us or our perception on various issues of life.
Most times, when we upload statuses on Facebook, we do it in a bid to get other people to acknowledge or even agree with you totally on whatever it is you’ve uploaded. This is achieved when they ‘like’ your status, or ‘react’ to it since Facebook has been upgraded.
Now, what are those Facebook statuses that you could upload to get a lot of likes? Don’t rack your brain, we’ve got you on that. Here are statuses you could upload on Facebook to get more likes.
1. Beauty doesn’t have to be all about the face alone, Beauty should be about everything about you. Like if you agree.
2. I don’t care if my hands get dirty while I’m making ends meet, what matters is the clean money I get after doing it all.
3. If you ever try doing what’s right and it doesn’t work out well, just consider the fact that you might have been doing the right thing the wrong way.
4. Why work so hard to be like someone else when you can easily be the best version of yourself.
5. Happiness doesn’t always come from within, sometimes happiness comes from little things that count a lot to us.
6. Contentment isn’t about having everything you want, it’s about appreciating everything you have.
7. Not everyone that comes to your life is a blessing, some are just there to teach you lessons that your blessings never taught.
8. One minute they’re all cuddly and lovey, the next minute they’re all cranky and touchy, Yeah, you guessed right, They’re girls.
9. Don’t feel bad when people hate you for no reason, they’re always like that when they try to be like you but fail at it.
10. People might hate or rate you, but don’t let them ever break you cos they never made you.
11. Call me crazy or what have you, but I’m not bad, I only treat people the way they treat me.
12. You’ll be at peace when you understand that you don’t always get what you want in life.
13. Being all sweet and kind is never an assurance that you’ll be treated the same way.
14. You don’t need a lot of people to be better in life because as they say “too many cooks spoil the broth”.
15. Always having you in mind blows my mind.
16. The real purpose of Facebook has been defeated, How can you send me a friend request and refuse to chat me when I accept?
17. Don’t be fooled, I only show you the part of me I want you to know about.
18. Chatting would have been much better if we all come to the realization of the fact that it actually works either way, not always waiting for the second party to chat first.
19. If you see the weird me and say you thought I was normal, that simply means you’ve seen the abnormal me because I’m mostly not normal but always weird.
20. My love life is just like the hair on the shell of eggs, absolutely nonexistent.
Sweet Facebook Status
Increase your posts likes with these sweet Facebook status
1. Most times people misunderstand me, I’d be on my energy saving mode and people will think I’m lazy.
2. Live your life and love your life, you can’t change how people feel about your life.
3. No matter how good you are, those who hate you for no reason will not stop hating you.
4. Isn’t it amazing how you’d be ready to go miles for people only to find out that they wouldn’t even move an inch for you?
5. I stopped treating you like my cup of tea the moment I knew I could have a glass of champagne.
6. It’s extremely rare to find someone who loves you for who you are, when you find one, hold them tight because they are rare gems.
7. The beauty of the heart means a lot to me, but I’d definitely wanna be attracted to the beauty on your face before looking deep into the beauty of your heart.
8. When people I love leave me, I don’t cry, cos in the end, I get to know that it’s a one-sided thing.
9. Do it right all the time and they’ll act like it’s normal, make a mistake once and the whole world is on your neck.
10. The craziest people actually have the purest of hearts.
11. Don’t ever force people to love you because forced love isn’t worth fighting for.
12. Getting older comes with the ability to detect assholes even before they start talking.
13. Life’s not always fair, people will hurt you and still act like the hurt one.
14. Most times I’m scared of what comes out of my mouth even before other people hear it.
15. I just wish I could tell a lot of people ‘Goodbye and I hope we never meet again’ than saying ‘Goodmorning, it’s good to see you again’.
16. You say you don’t like me, whoever told you I care about you liking me or not?
17. People often confuse my attitude with my character, my character is based on me while my attitude is based on you.
18. Remember that thing in your head that holds you back from saying what’s on your mind? well, mine is broken.
19. It doesn’t matter how well you choose your friends, you’ll always end up having that one person who’s not always smart, if there’s none in your circle of friends, then that person is probably you.
20. I’m always busy, always busy doing nothing.
Status Updates That Get Attention
We all like attention because nobody enjoys being ignored, that’s why we’ve made a list of statuses you can update on Facebook to get you that attention you want.
1. Play me like a game, and I’ll let you win at the losing game.
2. If you’re ever confused as to where I stand in your life, then you have no business having me in your life in the first place.
3. If I ever have to ask for your attention, you should know that you’ve automatically lost my attention.
4. I love having people give me a lot of attention, yeah, drown me in the river of attention.
5. When people give me attitude, it shows me how desperate they are to draw my attention to them.
6. Don’t start what you can’t finish, if you can’t give me attention all the time, then it’ll be just fine if you don’t give me attention at all.
7. Give me your attention for a minute, and you’ll have mine for the day.
8. It’s not so bad when those you love make you feel and know that you’re wanted as much as you love them.
9. Getting my attention isn’t so cheap nor so expensive, it all depends on your attitude to me.
10. Someone asked me to spell turkey. Gosh, I couldn’t, I was wondering if the person meant the bird or the country.
11. I’d rather have low expectations of you and be surprised than have high expectations of you and be disappointed.
12. I just can’t hold myself back from laughing when people claim they know me well enough, I don’t even know me!
13. You need ME to make you awesoME and handsoME, without me you’re just ‘aweso’ and ‘handso’.
14. It will look great, when I create a Facebook account and name it NOBODY, so when useless people on Facebook make useless post, I will like it, and it will say NOBODY likes this.
15. About 70 percent of my friends on Facebook are not friends with their parents, I am still wondering if they don’t show on the, ‘’did you know’’
16. I am not as addicted to Facebook as some of my friends, I only have time to update my status, when I wake up, breakfast time, work time, break time, this time, that time, all the time of my day.
17. One quick question you all, I have 8 big fishes, 4 drowned and 4 came back to life? How many fishes do I have all together?? Common you dummy stop counting, fish can’t drown.
18. I have always wondered why a newspaper, looks more interesting from 2 tables across, till I grab it and go through it myself.
19. I have been to hell before, but it was long before the devil got tired and kicked me out. I guess I was too hot.
20. Who else has missed a call from an unknown number and rushed to save it as AAA, then quickly access whatsapp to see their Display Photo?
And that’s it! I’m sure you’ve been able to get one or two sarcastic Facebook statuses that will get likes to update on Facebook now.